It may surprise no one or it may surprise everyone, but one of the greatest Cowboys to ever play the game just took a huge dump on his former team. Yes, by dump, I mean poop.

Troy Aikman, a guy I hated growing up in Philadelphia, is actually one of the best, most articulate and most insightful analysts in the NFL. Recently, he took to the airwaves to voice his displeasure with the fans that used to cheer him so loudly in Dallas.

“I’ve always said Dallas isn’t so much a sports town as it is a winner’s town,” Aikman told SportsRadio 1310 The Ticket.

Oh really, Troy. Tell us more (via Deadspin).

“When we would play in Philadelphia, New York and walk out of the tunnel, I would have to be yelling at the top of my lungs for guys to hear me. And you get on the plane for the flight home and your head would be pounding, you wouldn’t have a voice, and that’s just the way that it was,” Aikman said.

We can’t wait for when Aikman jumps into the broadcast booth at the next Cowboys game. Unfortunately, it won’t be this week, as he slated for the Giants-49ers game. Then again, maybe the San Francisco fans will leave his “head pounding on the flight home.” Or, more likely, leave his stomach pounding for munchies.

In cheerier news involving retired players talking about their former teams, Ricky Watters is sorry for saying, “For who? For what?”

Big Baby on the track

We’re not going to lie, we had to Google Glen Davis’ name to make sure he was still playing basketball. He is indeed still playing — for the Orlando Magic, according to Google.

Apparently, he has decided to embark on a side career as a … wait for it … rapper. No lie, Drake, no lie.

The song is called “Big Baby Gon’ Turn It Up.” Our early reviews are in … think Nicki Minaj (the new version, not the mixtape one) with lots of auto-tune, snappy beats and a repetitive hook — so naturally it’ll be on Billboard’s Top 100 in no time.

Best line: “You know just what my name is, Big Baby, and I’m kind of famous.”

Which got us thinking about NBA players we really, really want to make a rap song. Obviously, the first name to come to mind was Denver’s JaVale McGee. Based on what he can (can’t?) do on the court, the track is bound for platinum status.