We all knew that when Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes divorced, it was going to be a weird one. What we didn’t expect was that after five years, Katie would snap out of her dead-behind-the-eyes trance with so much fight left in her.

Before filing for divorce on Thursday, the actress had already rented a separate apartment for herself in New York. Although she does occasionally live in the city, it could have been a strategic move: She’s requesting sole custody of 6-year-old daughter Suri, which is more likely to be granted in New York than Los Angeles, where joint custody is more popular.

“Katie’s primary concern remains, as it always has been, her daughter’s best interest,” Holmes’ lawyer said in a statement Friday.

The “best interest” part is, reportedly, a reference to the Church of Scientology, which Holmes doesn’t want Suri raised in. Although a high-profile member of the religion while with Cruise, Holmes is now afraid that she is considered a “threat” to the organization — similar to how Nicole Kidman was shunned after her divorce from Cruise — and is being followed around New York by church authorities, reports TMZ.

It’s all very creepy, for sure. But if Scientology wants to be respected as a real religion in 2012, it’s going to have to start doing much more depraved stuff than stalking Katie Holmes.

Was Cruise blindsided?

In statement released by his rep, Tom Cruise claims he is “deeply saddened” to learn of the filing, which happened while he was shooting his latest, “Oblivion,” on location in Iceland.

And yes, while we’re also hesitant to believe Cruise feels real human emotions off camera, it does seem that he wasn’t expecting the filing: Sources tell UsMagazine.com that the family was recently spotted at a Reykjavik restaurant having fun with no potential for a photo op.

Just last month, he was being uncharacteristically closer to cute than couch-jumping-crazy when speaking about his wife to Playboy. “She is an extraordinary person, and if you spent five minutes with her, you’d see it,” he told the magazine.

Well now, this is awkward: Tom-Cruise-as-robot is one of the few sacred pillars of this page. Katie Holmes, we don’t have much over here — please don’t ruin this for us.

Congrats, Adele!

Over the weekend, Adele announced that she is pregnant with her first baby with boyfriend Simon Konecki.

“I’m delighted to announce that Simon and I are expecting our first child together,” the singer posted on her website. “I wanted you to hear the news direct from me. Obviously, we’re over the moon and very excited.”

Babies, boyfriends, No. 1 albums: How is Adele supposed to pen super-catchy songs about heartbreak when this is what she’s waking up to? This lady is one puppy away from a Metro intervention.